Whether one has a partner or is relating to friends, work colleagues, and relatives; our lives and minds are often filled and confused by the ups and downs of relationships. In this course, we will learn to recognize the skillfulness or unskillfulness of our actions with others by better understanding the underlying intentional roots behind these actions. We will learn to distinguish between intimacy and attachment, and between clear discernment and judgment. With practice, we can learn to transform the relational habits arising out of greed, fear, anger and denial into ways of relating arising out of generosity, kindness, and wisdom.
Audio
Principles for Wholesome Relationships
Resources for Wholesome Relationships
- Handout: Cultivating Wholesome Relationships Worksheet (page 1) (page 2)
- Sigalovada Sutta: The Buddha’s Advice to Sigalaka, translated from the Pali by John Kelly, Sue Sawyer, and Victoria Yareham
- “Intimate Relationship as a Spiritual Crucible” By John Welwood
- I Do? A Buddhist struggles with impermanence vs. marriage BY: Susan Piver
- We’re so Close, it’s lonely By Susan Piver
- “Buddhism and Relationships” by Susan Piver
- Romantic Vision vs. Everyday Disappointment, JUDITH SIMMER-BROWN
- After the Honeymoon By Thich Nhat Hanh
- Sedaka Sutta: The Bamboo Acrobat, translated from the Pali by Andrew Olendzki
- Radical Acceptance of Desire by Tara Brach
- Nothing is Left Out by Ajahn Sumedho, Taken from Voice of Insight edited by Sharon Salzberg
- No Gain: Relationships won’t solve our problems, but they can help us grow, By Barry MagidTricycle, Summer, 2008
- How to Get Beyond Our Tribal Politics By JONATHAN HAIDT and RAVI IYER
Buddhist Personality Types
- Which buddhist personality type are you? Greedy, Aversive, or Deluded? Find out with this guide—and quiz!— from Amita Schmidt in Tricycle, Spring, 2009
- Personality Types by Sharon Salzberg in Heart as Wide as the World
Additional Study Resources
- Why You Will Marry the Wrong Person By ALAIN de BOTTON New York Times, MAY 28, 2016
- Alain de Botton interviewed by Krista Tippett on her radio program, On Being, titled:The True Hard Work of Love and Relationships.
- Love Relationships Tricycle EBook
- A Mindful Marriage, Kittisaro and Thanissara on Celibacy, Sex, and Lasting Love by Leslee Goodman in The Sun, January, 2009
- Perfect Love Imperfect Relationships by John Welwood, Exercises for Chapters 1&2